WATH-UPON-DEARNE 0-19 FALCONS – MATCH REPORT

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If the last match report was compiled in the bath. This weeks was assembled whilst watching Home Alone 2 lost in New York with kids.

For me it’s easily the strongest of the Home Alone collection! Some might argue its slightly more slapstick than the original, but it’s undeniably a laugh a minute Christmas classic.

Difficult to make a link to rugby……… best I could do was get to thinking as to wether Marv and Harry would make my festive movie select rugby 1-15. Marv looks good strong pick for a spot in the row along side Will Ferrell as Elf. The jury is still undecided if Harry looks like a nuggety 6, certainly similar in looks and stature to first team vice captain Lewis Bradley, or maybe at spot at hooker? I’ll keep thinking and post my festive movie 1- 15 at the bottom. Feel free to join in!!

This week the falcons travelled with 16 payers to Wath upon Dearne. What an absolute pleasure to travel to Rotherham and visit a friendly ‘proper’ rugby club. Once you had navigated past the plethora of fastfood eating establishment you arrive in Wath via the former site of Cortonwood Colliery. For the uniformed amongst you this played a pivotal role in the 1984-85 miners strike. Pre-game, Tony Stringwell was quick to highlight his South Yorkshire mining upbringing which may explain his insistence on playing in his ‘coal not dole’ badge.

As always with the falcons we had a few last min cry offs. But the lads made a strong start and took an early 7 point lead thanks to an excellently finished try from James Davies, which Scrimmy converted.

On what was a cold rainy day, the falcons dismissed the pre-game instruction to build phases and instead started to move the ball wide early which did lead to a number of early opportunities emanating from this expansive approach.

However the game then became fragmented when the team was depleted to 14 men after they lost James Davies to a sin bin for slap come push to the face. Maybe for a split second he visualised he was Tyson Fury and the 5ft 10 Wath Flanker was Dante Wilder? It’s an unanswered question and given who was involved one we are unlikely to get an articulate answer to. Furthermore and very regrettably, a Wath player then sustained a serious injury which lead to a lengthy break in play. All at the club wish him a speedy recovery.

Upon restarting the game, the falcons continued to have success by moving the ball wide. Harry Granger made an outstanding break before foolishly passing the ball to Tony ‘if the camera adds 10 pounds, then how many cameras has he got on him’ Stringwell. With nothing but 20 meters of grass in front of him and with the line beckoning, the quick sand that has often plagued Tony’s career yet again struck when he inexplicably slowed to a standstill with 5 metres to go before being tackled and therefore managing to bomb a definite try. At the end of the game he was overheard offering a post game tutorial/explanation to younger team mates, which included references to Wigan rugby league and Sean Edwards habit of trucking up the middle of the pitch. This drew blank expressions and references to him resembling a slow David Wilson.

The half then drew to a close with nothing more to comment on other than a number of Gary Owens, followed by knock ons and another scrum. At times it was like watching rugby in the 1980’s which Huddersfield’s number 3 and 5 were more than comfortable with and seemed to revel in.

After a strong start to the second half, Huddersfield extended their lead when Tony ‘ bet he would have scored that try in the first half if there was sandwich on the try line’ Stringwell splashed over from 18 inches.

The Falcons leader and recently voted the 9th most famous person from Barnsley, Gavin Rhodes crashed over for a third try. Certainly that was the view of the post game rugby committee, given the author of this report genuinely has no idea nor recollection of this event. Let’s assume he did. #kes #straightontameat #gavwillbebobbycharlton. *EDIT The lack of recollection has proven true as it was Ben Royds who got the try!!!

For the remainder of the game Huddersfield were dominant but unfortunately were unable to get the fourth try that they deserved. There were some great performances  from a number of lads and this was a good win away from home. With the team including veteran players and lads unfortunate not to be playing first team, along new recruits and former academy players; the side continues to build and move forward.

Festive movie select 15.

1.    Santa- take your pick on which one.
2.    Harry- home alone- like a nuggety hooker.
3.    Ghost of Christmas Present- muppet Christmas carol. Big hairy unit.
4.    Marv- home alone- line out specialist. Durable.
5.    Elf- big unit- load up on sugar and watch him go.
6.    George Bailey- it’s a wonderful life- falcons passion for larger will turn it round for the lad.
7.    John McClane- yippee Ki-ya MF. Shoe in at 7. Dogged backrow material.
8.    Arnold Schwarzenegger – jingle all the way- unit!
9.    Gonzo- muppet Christmas carol. crackers. Fit right in at 9.
10.    Hans Gruber- ruthless. master tactician.
11.    Rudolph- gone for out and out pace. The beak may indicate a whiskey problem.
12.    Chevy chase- national lampoons Christmas- bit of size and guile.
13.    Bill Murray- scrooged. Crash ball merchant all day I reckon.
14.    Blitzen- mate for Rudolph. Will do a job.
15.    The grinch- like a French 15. Element of surprise!

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Rugby Results

30/SepA Team v Leodensians 2 12-27(L)
01/OctColts v Harrogate
30/SepFirst XV v Leeds Tykes 10-52 (L)
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